The Fat Bloke Diaries

 

Episode Thirty-Four – Blame it on the Weatherman

It seemed inevitable that I would put some weight on while I was on holiday in Orlando. Over two weeks a diet of pizza and other tasty but nutritionally dubious delights was bound to have an adverse effect on my waistline, and my liver. Indeed, my first meal on U.S. soil was almost inevitably that great American classic, a bacon double cheeseburger. This was my own choice of course; I’m not looking for absolution of my own dietary sins. It tasted disgusting and wonderful at the same time. And just to be on the healthy side, I washed it down with an extra-large Diet Coke; I do like to fit in with the locals when I travel.

I know that I should have been eating more healthily, but the sad fact is that it's very difficult to feast on anything but junk in the tourist areas of Central Florida. Dining with concern for my heart and colon was always going to be a challenge. For example, it's almost impossible to locate a vegetable that isn't either ice-cold shredded lettuce or a slice of tomato (don't start on that 'tomato is a fruit' thing), and even these are only to be seen on a burger or a chicken sandwich. Even on the one occasion that I found something that was described as a salad, it consisted solely of lettuce and croutons.

So it was with some trepidation that I tiptoed onto the scales the morning after I returned home. Surely I would have reverted to my default Standard Bloater Setting? But do you know what? I was exactly the same weight as when I'd left dear old Blighty. Maybe running in Floridian heat did some good after all?

I've heard that in higher altitudes the air is thinner. It stands to reason then that at sea level the air would be thicker. Now I've been to the top of mountains, and I've been on ocean liners, but I've never been running on either. I did run in Florida though and the air did indeed seem much heavier there than at home. Or maybe it was just my clothing? Even the wikkiest of wikky material couldn't shift that amount of sweat away from me. It was like I'd been hosed down with several gallons of
jus du Shaun. Nice.

The weatherman told me that humidity rose to almost 90% over there and, with the density of the air, I can believe him. Mind you, I'd have believed whatever he said as I've never understood humidity levels at all. If it reaches 100% is that like running underwater? It certainly felt like it as the holiday passed and the weather deteriorated. The thunderstorms were some of the worst I've ever seen, and the flood warnings came thick and fast. At one point I swear I saw an entire zoo float by.

In those conditions it was imperative that I look after my feet. Lotions, powders and frequent drying all helped, but it was always likely that I was going to develop a few hot spots. To be honest I'm just glad that I didn't succumb to trench foot. At least my feet fared much better than those of my Beloved. She didn't manage to run with me at all while we were away. Due to an incorrect footwear choice she suffered early holiday blisters. And she also had a nasty reaction to some insect bites on her legs that made stretching them painful. She patched herself up enough to continue shopping but not enough to get up for a five a.m. jog. At least that's what she told me.

To be honest I think that I missed too much of my training. I know that I was on holiday, and I should feel smugly self-righteous about making even the smallest efforts to run while away, but I simply didn't cover the same number of miles that I would have done at home. I really didn't want to fall too far behind schedule but with temperatures that high, and in such severe rainfall (four months worth in just three days) it was difficult.

I found the physical act of running there much harder than it is at home, even though the ground was much flatter. But I persevered, getting out for six runs of around a mile and a half each, and also walked between five and twelve miles every day. I’ve come back hopeful that I'll see some benefit from it when I take to the streets of South Yorkshire again.

The comparison is going to be interesting.


© Shaun Finnie 2009
 

 

 

 


 

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